It IS a Big Deal When You Feel Confident Enough NOT to Cover Yourself with a Towel Between the Locker Room & Pool!

image

That's the First Non-Stop 1,000 Yards I've Swam in YEARS!

I knew I wanted to push it in the pool…and I DID!

image

No-Towel-Cover-Up Confidence!

Advertisements

When You Don’t WANT to Swim is When You Need to Honor Yourself and Swim

image

750 Yards And 16 Minutes Later, Just Look at That Smile!

image

That's 750 Yards WITHOUT Stopping!

Please Note For the Record That I Do NOT Want to Swim, but I Want to Feel Powerful, So I’m Here

image

I Will Swim. Reluctantly.

I was thrown for a loop this afternoon and consequently, wanted to hide under the covers until tomorrow. Then C reminded me that the woman who wants to go get em is still in there, and I took her to Starbucks to awkwardly work on my thesis. Progress was made without an ounce of grace.

C also reminded me that I feel powerful after a swim, so I’m here now at the pool. Reluctantly.

My Body Said No

image

Goose Walk

I had BIG plans for an evening swim tonight (you know…yes-ter-day?) but I started to feel tired. Really tired. And sore (you know…yo-ga?). I went on a great walk at the zoo with a great friend this afternoon; I recorded approximately 5,000 steps! Then this evening, as swim time approached, my body said: no.

Momentarily I assumed I was being lied too, that this was just my anxiety pushing its agenda. My anxiety is skilled at convincing me to work harder, not better; that working right means monotony-until-burn-out; and pulling away from and avoiding work is an optimal strategy to recover from exhaustion.

I listened to my body. It said it needed rest, and I slowly began to trust its motives. I compromised: I worked an extra hour on a small thesis goal BUT with an expiration time regardless of goal-completion (burn out protection).

This is a new balancing technique for me: I rearranged plans guilt free and added protective parameters.

My body says it’s bedtime.

Little Phitness & Big Pharmaceutical

image

Today wasn’t a good day. Nothing in particular, just not an easy day to navigate; not an easy day for my loved ones to witness. I don’t hide my anxiety and consequently, depression. I’m not ashamed that I manage my mental health with a toolbox of resources I’m always learning to use. Today I think I hit a low point, and I feel pretty sad. And hopeful; I supplemented big pharmaceuticals with a little fitness. The gym was going to close in less than an hour but I went over and swam my hardest for ten minutes. Now I feel less sad, and that is wonderful.